The Return of the Condor Heroes Chapter 13 – Part 3

The Diancang Fisherman had always possessed immense natural strength. During his years of seclusion with Great Master Yideng¹ in western Hunan,² he had rowed his iron oars daily against fierce upstream currents, tempering his arms until the sinews and bones were like iron. As Great Master Yideng’s eldest disciple, he had received the most direct instruction. Among the four great disciples, his martial arts had always ranked first, though his natural gifts were inferior and his neili³ fell short of Zhu Ziliu’s. But his external hard-style skills were fearsome in the extreme. Now, matching external skill against external skill with Da’erba, he was playing precisely to his strengths. His twin oars danced through the air in ferocious, straight-line attacks. Each iron oar weighed over fifty jin,⁴ yet he wielded them with the ease of an ordinary man swinging a blade weighing a few jin.

Da’erba had always prided himself on having no equal in physical strength. Never had he imagined meeting such a titan of divine force in the Central Plains. Not only was his opponent immensely strong, but his moves were far more refined. Da’erba now brought the full power of his vajra pestle to bear. Pestle against oar, oar against pestle, both men favoured attack over defence.

During the duel between Zhu Ziliu and Huo Dou, the spectators in the hall had already scattered to avoid the stray attacks. Now, with three heavy weapons colliding, it was not only the fierce wind that was hard to endure, the thunderous crashes of oar against pestle were almost unbearable in themselves. Most of the crowd watched with hands pressed over their ears. In the glow of the candlelight, the golden pestle transformed into a beam of golden light, while the wrought-iron oars became two streams of black vapour, intertwining as they clashed.

Few among those present had ever witnessed such a duel. More perilous scenes certainly existed, but when masters contest their internal energies, the inner struggle is desperately intense while the outward appearance remains calm. As for the feints and counters of fist, foot, and weapon, there may be greater cleverness, but for sheer savagery, nothing could compare. Men of the Diancang Fisherman’s divine strength were already rare in the world. For two men of equal power and comparable skill to meet in such ferocious combat, that was rarer still, and harder to witness.

Guo Jing and Huang Rong watched with sweat-drenched hands. Guo Jing said, “Ronger,⁵ do you think we can win?” Huang Rong said, “It is too soon to tell.” Guo Jing knew perfectly well that the outcome could not yet be determined, but he had hoped his wife would say, “The Fisherman will win,” just to ease his heart.

They fought on through several dozen more moves. Neither man’s strength flagged in the slightest, instead, their vigour seemed to grow. The Diancang Fisherman pressed his attack with both oars, bellowing to bolster his power. Da’erba asked, “What did you say?” He spoke in Mongolian, which the Fisherman could not understand. The Fisherman also asked, “What did you say?” Da’erba understood even less. The two proceeded to curse at each other while fighting savagely, until tables and chairs were reduced to splinters flying through the hall. The onlookers feared that a single careless blow against a pillar might bring the entire hall crashing down.

The Golden Wheel National Preceptor and Huo Dou were also secretly alarmed. If the battle continued at this pitch, even if Da’erba won, he would surely collapse from exhaustion or suffer grave injury. But with the fight at its fiercest, how could it be stopped?

The two men leapt and bounded, roaring as they battled. The yellow light and black vapour dimmed the candles. Then came an earth-shaking crash, and with a simultaneous roar, both men sprang apart. The Fisherman’s right iron oar had met the golden pestle in a full-force clash. The oar’s shaft, being thinner, could not match the pestle’s solidity and snapped in two. The broken blade flew through the air and landed with a clang at Xiaolongnü’s feet.

Xiaolongnü was deep in conversation with Yang Guo, paying no attention at all. The oar blade struck the brick floor, shattering a tile. A small shard bounced up and struck her left foot on the toe. She cried out in pain and jumped up. Only then did Yang Guo realise what had happened. “Are you hurt?” he asked anxiously. Xiaolongnü rubbed her toe, her face pained.

Yang Guo was furious, and his heart flooded with protective tenderness. First, he pulled Xiaolongnü close, shielding her from any further harm, then turned to find who had hurled the iron plate that shattered the tile and hurt his Gugu. He saw the Diancang Fisherman holding the broken oar in his right hand, arguing with Da’erba, insisting on continuing the fight with the single remaining oar. Da’erba shook his head repeatedly. He knew that his opponent’s strength and skill were evenly matched with his own. Another bout would be hard to win, and since he had gained the advantage in weaponry, this contest was already his.

---

Huo Dou stepped forward and declared loudly, “We have won two of the three bouts. The position of Alliance Chief of the jianghu⁶ therefore belongs to my master. Everyone…” Before he could finish, Yang Guo said to the Fisherman, “Why did your iron oar break and fly over to hurt my Gugu?” The Fisherman stammered, “I… I…” Yang Guo said, “You should have made your oar sturdier. Go and apologise at once.” The Fisherman, seeing he was just a boy, ignored him. Yang Guo suddenly reached out, snatched the broken oar from his grasp, and shouted, “Apologise to my Gugu this instant.”

Huo Dou, his speech interrupted, was furious. “Little beast! Get out of here!” he barked.

Yang Guo called back, “Who is the little beast cursing?” Hearing the question, Huo Dou answered without thinking, “The little beast is cursing you!” How could he know that the children of Jiangnan⁷ always used this verbal trap? He had walked right into it. Yang Guo roared with laughter. “Correct, it is indeed a little beast cursing me!” The atmosphere in the hall had been tense to the breaking point, but this sudden diversion from the youth made everyone laugh. Huo Dou was enraged. He thrust his folding fan straight at Yang Guo’s head.

The heroes had all witnessed Huo Dou’s martial prowess. If this fan blow landed on Yang Guo’s head, death or grave injury was certain. “Stop!” they shouted. “You cannot bully the young!”

Guo Jing rushed forward, reaching to seize the fan, but Yang Guo ducked his head and slipped under Huo Dou’s arm. Swinging the oar handle, he used the “Entwine”⁸ formula of the Dog-Beating Staff Technique to hook behind Huo Dou’s foot. Huo Dou lost his footing and staggered, nearly falling. Fortunately, his martial arts were strong, and he transformed the stumble into a leap, springing into the air and landing firmly.

Guo Jing stared. “Guoer, what was that?”

Yang Guo laughed. “Nothing much. This fellow looks down on Old Chief Hong’s Dog-Beating Staff Technique, so I thought I would use it to trip him up. Too bad he got away.”

Guo Jing was astonished. “How do you know how to use it?”

Yang Guo lied smoothly. “Just now, when Chief Lu fought him, I watched and picked up a few moves.” Guo Jing, whose own natural gifts were dull, assumed there were many clever people in the world and believed him eight or nine parts out of ten.

Huo Dou, having been tripped by Yang Guo, assumed it was his own carelessness. How could he imagine that a boy of fourteen or fifteen possessed such advanced martial arts? The contest for Alliance Chief is the important matter, he thought. I will deal with this brat after the formalities. He strode up to Guo Jing and declared loudly, “Hero Guo, today’s contest is our victory. My master, the Golden Wheel National Preceptor, is the Alliance Chief of the jianghu Under Heaven. Is there anyone who disagrees…”

Before he could finish, Yang Guo crept up behind him, thrust the oar handle forward, and used the fourth formula of the Dog-Beating Staff Technique. “Jab”⁹, stabbing toward his buttocks. With Huo Dou’s level of martial cultivation, how could he not sense a sneak attack from behind? But first, he had never taken Yang Guo seriously, and second, the Dog-Beating Staff Technique was truly wondrous and unfathomable. Though he sensed the danger and twisted aside, he was still a few inches too slow. Thump, the handle struck him squarely on the rear. For all his profound neili, and though the buttocks are a fleshy region, the blow was still quite painful. More than that, it was utterly unexpected. He had been certain he would evade it, yet it had struck him nonetheless, and he could not help crying out. Yang Guo shouted, “What was that? I disagree!”

In an instant, laughter erupted through the hall. The heroes all thought, This boy is not only mischievous, but audacious too, the Mongol prince has fallen for his tricks twice now.

At this point, how could Huo Dou not be furious? He swung a backhand palm, meaning to slap the boy senseless first and vent his spleen. Though it was a casual backhand, the force and momentum it carried represented the essence of Mongolian Vajra Sect¹⁰ martial arts. He intended to lay the boy out cold with a single blow. Guo Jing knew how dangerous it was. His left hand shot out, hooked back, and seized Huo Dou’s palm. “Surely,” he urged, “you cannot stoop to the level of a child.” Huo Dou, caught in that grip, felt half his body go numb and was stunned with shock and fury.

Yang Guo seized the opening, swung the oar handle sideways, and landed a heavy blow on Huo Dou’s rear. “Little beast won’t listen to reason,” he called. “Daddy’s going to spank you!” Guo Jing barked, “Guoer, step back at once! No more mischief!” But the heroes were already laughing so hard they could barely stand.

The Mongol warriors began shouting: “Two against one?” “Have you no shame?” “Does this count as a contest?” Guo Jing, taken aback, released Huo Dou.

Huang Rong had seen that Yang Guo’s trip and jab were indeed moves from the Dog-Beating Staff Technique, and grave doubt filled her mind. Where did he steal this staff technique? Could he have been spying every day during these months while I taught Lu Youjiao? But each time I taught, I checked the surroundings carefully. How could he have hidden from me? She called, “Jing gege, come here.” Guo Jing returned to his wife’s side, though his eyes never left the two figures in the centre of the hall, worried that Yang Guo might come to harm.

Huo Dou was now striking with palm and kicking with foot in a relentless assault on Yang Guo. Yang Guo dodged and weaved, shouting all the while: “Spank your bottom! Spank your bottom!” He swung the oar handle repeatedly at Huo Dou’s rear, but now that Huo Dou was using his full movement technique, every blow missed. Huo Dou tried to strike Yang Guo’s head with his fan, while Yang Guo tried to hit Huo Dou’s backside with the oar handle. The two chased each other in rapid circles around the hall, neither landing a blow.

The spectators initially found it comical and bizarre, but after they had circled several times, amazement set in. Young as he was, Yang Guo moved with light, swift steps. His lightness skill¹¹ seemed to surpass his opponent’s. Several times Huo Dou rushed in for a strike, only for Yang Guo to evade with clever footwork.

The Diancang Fisherman and Da’erba had been standing with weapons raised, glaring at each other, one ready to charge back into the fight, the other fully alert against a sudden attack. But seeing that Huo Dou could not handle this boy, both were astonished. One split his mouth in a broad grin. The other muttered curses in Mongolian.

In the blink of an eye, Huo Dou and Yang Guo had circled three more times. Huo Dou had now gauged his opponent’s lightness skill. Pursuing him in a chase might even result in a loss. He suddenly spun around, thrust his left palm out to grab the oar handle, and jabbed his fan toward the “Leaping Circle”¹² acupoint on Yang Guo’s thigh. This was no longer the disciplining of a naughty child, it was now a formal contest.

Yang Guo still refused to engage directly. He twisted aside to evade the fan and swung the oar handle sideways, shouting: “Daddy’s going to spank you! No more than three times a day. I have hit you twice, I still owe you one!” To clown around like this during a fight normally required martial arts far superior to the opponent’s to avoid disaster. Yang Guo had indeed learned many advanced techniques, but his cultivation level was far below his opponent’s. Such foolery should have brought certain doom. But the heroes were thoroughly entertained, cheering and jeering, clapping and stomping to encourage him. The noise rattled Huo Dou, who was terrified that before the eyes of all the heroes under heaven, this brat might land one more blow on his rear. Even if he killed the boy on the spot afterward, the humiliation would be colossal. So he focused entirely on evasion and, for the moment, forgot to counterattack. This was how Yang Guo had so far escaped danger.

By now, Huang Rong had long since seen that Yang Guo had received instruction from a great master, and that his martial arts were genuinely impressive. She also recalled how, earlier that day, he had used his neili to help regulate her breathing, his internal cultivation was likewise remarkable. Let him stir up chaos for a while, she thought. Perhaps he can somehow reverse the momentum of two consecutive defeats. She called out loudly: “Guoer, fight him properly. I do not think he is your match.”

Yang Guo stuck out his tongue at Huo Dou. “Do you dare?” He planted himself and pointed at Huo Dou’s nose.

Footnotes

1. 一灯大师 – Yīdēng Dàshī. Literally one-lamp master; a Buddhist honorific title. See Wuxia Wiki. ↩

2. Western Hunan (湘西). Xiāngxī. Mountainous region in western Hunan province where Great Master Yideng and his disciples lived in seclusion. ↩

3. 内功 – nèigōng. Literally internal skill. Practice of developing neili through breathing, meditation and qi cultivation. See Wuxia Wiki. ↩

4. 斤 – jīn. Traditional Chinese unit of weight, approximately 500 grams or 1.1 pounds. See Wuxia Wiki. ↩

5. 蓉儿 – Róng’ér. Intimate nickname for Huang Rong, with the diminutive suffix -er indicating affection or familiarity. ↩

6. Alliance Chief of the jianghu (武林盟主). Wǔlín Méngzhǔ. Elected leader of the jianghu, chosen at a grand assembly to unite all schools and sects against a common threat. This title is the central conflict of the chapter. ↩

7. 江南 – Jiāngnán. Prosperous region south of Yangtze River, continued from LOCH era. See Wuxia Wiki. ↩

8. 缠字诀 – Chán Zì Jué. One of the eight formulae of the Dog-Beating Staff Technique, using coiling motions. ↩

9. “Jab” formula (戳字诀). Chuō Zìjué. Another of the eight core Dog-Beating Staff Technique formulae, using sharp, probing thrusts. ↩

10. 金刚宗 – Jīngāng Zōng. Vajra (Diamond/Thunderbolt) school of Esoteric Buddhism, known for distinctive martial arts including the Dragon-Elephant Prajna Skill. ↩

11. 轻功 – qīnggōng. Literally lightness skill. Martial art of body lightness; practitioners leap great heights and move with extraordinary speed. See Wuxia Wiki. ↩

12. “Leaping Circle” acupoint (环跳穴). Huántiào Xué. Acupoint on the lateral thigh, part of the Gallbladder meridian. Striking it can disable leg movement. ↩